Also she'll want to meet the guy that makes her feel the most comfortable in meeting. But I haven't seen a person yet who cannot improve his lot by working hard on improving it.
Frankly, my Dad passed away 10 years ago and I'd still like to ask him some things now and then. I'll do as much as I can to help it to be a good place. There is this weird mentally, especially on circlejerking places like Reddit, that somehow you deserve to have all the things you want. You wake up and don't bother to shower but still expect people to enjoy your company? I can’t prove this scientifically, but other men look up to you, and the women follow naturally. You probably can’t be obese, but you don’t have to be jacked. A witty sense of humor and an educated mind goes a long way. I'm 27, and I've been trying to get over my own issues very hard for the last year or so.
Edit: If you're a virgin your body is going to be so excited to have sex the first time you're going to be rubbish. I want to keep up with helping out but I can't respond to every pm as well as I would like. They are the self-entitled ones who believe that food should fly in their mouths, and that their great inner values are enough to become great, no work needed. The most ridiculous and sexist concept I have ever heard of. But that doesn't change the matter: If you believe that somebody else to love you because you do something nice for them; if you believe that somebody else needs to feel a certain way because of things you do - then you are an idiot. Maybe you are just unlucky, there are a few of those - but, if you are honest with yourself, the chance that you are one of them is small. Bad for you that you say yes to all those donuts and chips. You avoid that donut and in return you wake up in the morning and your trousers fit. And then as far as dressing nice--fuck, some people figure out a cool style, other people look in magazines/clothing websites and try to find examples of stuff they're not totally embarrassed wearing that seems to fit in with the current style.
You can't expect to be an expert at something you're just trying for the first time. Don't watch porn to learn how to do this, read some of the great posts here about it. I thought a subreddit where other Dads could pitch in might be helpful. Sure, there might be one or two who would deserve better luck - but likely, when you are honest with yourself, you are probably not one of them. Yes, it's now applied in both directions, but traditionally it is that a woman "puts" a "nice" guy in the friendzone. If you are unhappily in the friendzone - you are an idiot, plain and simple. Is there a "fair" universe - where fair means biased in your favour - that gives you all the things you want? If you are on Reddit whining about your lack of friends or partner or your horrible job - then consider for a moment whether you are part of the problem, whether it is not your fault rather than the rest of the world being rude to you. Most people are socialised in this "get it all" society. You start reading a book on French and the next day you can talk fluently. But yeah, the breezy way Prolapsed Pineal describes all this is the sort of explanation that can only come from a dude who's been married for 20 years with stable friends/relationships for that long and completely forgets how tough it is building that stuff in the first place.
That you deserve that awesome woman or man that you only dare to stare at from a distance. You spend your nights all at home playing video games and still you expect to be able to have interesting discussions with other people? You don't deserve good things, you work for them. I've been working on getting back into shape and taking care of myself, but I've been in good shape before and I've always made an effort, its mostly just been a matter of confidence. You talk about getting hobbies and passions, well, you can't just chose to be passionate about something.
That you deserve the great body, healthy skin, perfect job, high pay, amazing holidays, the new computer or your dream fulfilled. There is no one in the universe that looks at you and says "well, you deserve to have all these things, I am going to give them to you". If you can read this you probably already had many great things thrown at you for which you didn't do a thing. The whole concept of "deserving" something, punishment or reward, is based on an ancient logic that there is somebody watching over us who can read your mind and rewards you for merely being good and punishes you for merely being bad. And you should be happy about that, because else probably you would be starving and not the Indian farmer who works 14 hours a day to feed his family and still half his children die from diarrhea and he himself with 30 from starvation. You can be one of the 1% or so lucky ones, those who get things for merely being born in the right family, or with the right looks or the incredible mental skills. I'm trying now to develop some new hobbies that are more likely to attract women, but for about 20 years my main hobby has been working on and playing with computers.