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Explore your relationships and sexuality, with yourself and with others, with this new book by Dr. Written particularly for people who are in intimate relationships, but also incredibly useful if you're single or dating and trying to unpack your past or plan for your future. Faith demystifies Explore your relationships and sexuality, with yourself and with others, with this new book by Dr. Written particularly for people who are in intimate relationships, but also incredibly useful if you're single or dating and trying to unpack your past or plan for your future. Faith demystifies topics such as kink, consent, shame, and trauma recovery.
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The explanation of PTSD is this: "The brain presumes that your past will be your future and goes into survival mode. Luckily, Harper wrote a book on this: "Unfuck Your Brain".If you're looking to heal from past wounds, make better choices, or improve an existing relationship, this book is for you. Whether you're queer, straight, trans, ace, demi, aro, are dealing with past abuse or societal bullshit, or have no freaking clue what's going on with you yet, Dr. I was looking for something deeper, maybe more spiritual or psychological, but this book still had some value despite being focused on a the more physical aspects of intimacy.My very favorite chapter is "Date Like a Grown Up" (pp 135-55).Affairs: I was honestly shocked to read that "research demonstrates that most relationships do recover from an affair." (p 181) That blew my mind.Monogamy and Polyamory: "Only 30% of primates are down for monogamy, and only 3% of mammals. This holds true of all genders." (p 188) That's 50/50 for both men and women, so watch out you sexist creeps.In today's world of Insta-dating, I see a lot of people falling into fast relationships that end up in the garbage after a year or so.It's irresponsible and impatient, but it's quickly becoming part of our dating culture.The rest of my review, I break down into the following areas that were of interest to me.PTSD: Harper explains that trauma tends to show up in intimate relationships, because those are the ones that require the most vulnerability. Your response is not about the present moment, instead your past experiences have gotten reactivated." (p 27) All I can say here is, yep.People can keep up a decent facade for about 3-4 months before their true colors start to show.This is why I'd prefer to be friends with someone first, before dating, so that I know what I'm getting into.